Tuesday, 18 October 2011

I'm Backing the Tortoise

Sometimes it feels like I’ve had more jobs than hot dinners.  A few of them had their fair share of misery!  My recollection of the best ‘team’ though came from the first two years at Leeds Nightstop – before Barnardo’s spoiled the party.  ‘Spoiled’ is a critical and partly subjective comment.  We joked that Nightstop was an organisation ‘devoted to serious coffee drinking punctuated by occasional prayer’.  I suspect our bucolic brook had a few too many meanders for the mighty river of corporate charitable efficiency.  This Hare and Tortoise race was always bound to end in tears.   For Hare and Tortoise read Cain and Abel?  Certainly, the early Nightstop pace contributed to its creativity and our shared sense that this was a good organisation.  Incidentally, we know who eventually won the race! At the moment I’m writing a book (‘The Gospel of Slow’) which develops the theme.

For the past couple of months I’ve taken a ‘blogging break’.  That’s a euphemism for another bout of depression.  Depression is a bad kind of ‘slow’- a kind of bludgeoning anaesthetic.  At the moment I’m still in the midst of it, but determined to find a new tempo guisto for blogging, writing, life and everything.  

9 comments:

Jake said...

Glad to see you back in the blogosphere Phil! I hope things do improve for you; I totally understand these rough times. And I will also be anticipating your book; another to add to my growing library.

sattler said...

Hi Jake, it's good to hear from you again. We've just had some work done to create a study at our place (a.k.a. Phil's library) so can entirely sympathize with too many books and not enough shelves. When it comes to books I'm a 100% Luddite. I'm working on finding a thousand uses for a kindle apart from actually using the thing. Blessings!

Radical Believer said...

Good to see you back Phil. Too often I find a blog I like and it just ends.

I too hope things improve for you - depression, been there, done that, would prefer not to go back.

sattler said...

I'm glad to be in touch again. Mostly, I enjoy blogging. Depression is such a life stealer. Blogging can certainly be hard work - especially the way I was doing it, chasing the rankings. That isn't why I first started blogging and I'm keen to learn a few things about pacing the blog better. Shalom, Phil

Word in the Hand said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Word in the Hand said...

Previous post removed because it had duplicated itself! maybe you needed to hear it twice - but here it is once :)

blessings Phil, have been praying for you - abrupt ends always worry me:)
I'm sure that you have your strategies and I have found that little patterns in the day such as - write one sentence/send one email/read one verse - help.


Pray inwardly, even if you do not enjoy it.
It does good, though you feel nothing.
Yes, even though you think you are doing nothing.

Prayer is not overcoming God's reluctance.
It is laying hold of His willingness.

Prayers continuing m+x

sattler said...

I'm increasingly convinced that multitasking isn't a wholesome practice. Between the blogging itself, all the social networking and coping with life in general, the blog had become a burden. I know some blogs have ended in similar circumstances. The first thing I did in returning to radref was remove the blog 'rankings' counter. Lovely to hear from you 'm'.

Brian R. Gumm said...

One of my fav Christian philosophers, Jamie Smith, gave Facebook a try for about a month or so and found it far too frenetic and distracting, negatively impacting his theological blogging as well as whatever else was going on in his "real" professional and family life. So he disabled his Facebook account. I gotta say, sometimes that sounds appealing to me, because I agree, Phil, multitasking isn't all it's cracked up to be.

So glad you're back and hope that blogging can be a life-giving practice for you again. Grace and peace to you!

sattler said...

Hi Brian. The sheer usefulness of technology is seductive sometimes. The forms of slavery that come with it don't advertise themselves.